MARRIAGE - A PROCESS

          In the recent days, when people, more generally ladies, meet at a particular place, be it home or office or market or railway stations or wherever, their topmost topic of conversation is not politics, not salaries, not inflation. Guess what? It is always about marriages. Horoscopes, horoscopes, horoscopes everywhere.. Seems like this epidemic has affected India more than Ebola.

          The conversation usually starts in the following fashion. First, there is this so – called courtesy or habitual enquiry about the well – being of the families. In the course of this talk, there comes the entry of our hero, that poor guy who has crossed 25. These people would start gossiping about him and create an illusion that staying single in India after crossing 25 years is a crime by itself. And, the punishment, as it is, would be getting him married to the girl of their choice.

          Only these ladies have the habit of surfing through the entire network of matrimonial sites sans going online. Believe me or not! They would start exchanging the IDs of various brides and grooms, who had registered in very popular sites, seeking their better halves. I wonder why the ‘clients’ in these kinds of divine marriage websites are always given numbers instead of their names, which will be displayed only after entering those numbers. Perhaps, this is to symbolize that if someone has not been married beyond a certain age limit, he is regarded and treated as a criminal (Note that criminals are given numbers in JAILS). The strangest fact is that none of the ladies in that discussion would have got bachelors or spinsters in their family. They would be performing this alleged social service for their acquaintance or a relative of a neighbor’s friend.

          The next process is to convey the details, i.e the ID to the families concerned. Mostly, this horoscope would get eliminated in the first stage itself. Oops.. Sorry for this delay in stating that there are some five or six stages after which a couple is officially decided. The first and foremost condition is the age difference, which varies with each and every family. Some would fix this at 5 or 6, some at 3, with some others wanting a senior girl to the boy. 90% of the horoscopes fail to cross this first hurdle and go in vain. Next, the stars of the boy and girl should match. For this, there are some experts, who would have memorized the match of stars. They would be called immediately to confirm this. In most of the cases, the answer would be negative and all the hardwork done by those ladies to arrive at a decision would become futile in no time.

          If at all the stars do match (rarely does this occur), the next is the background check. Queries like where the boy/girl’s father and mother work, what is their pension, whether they are government employees fall in this category. Remember that all this occurs without the consent of the boy/girl. Who cares? These parents are planning a safe, secure and blissful future for their wards. So, don’t complain.

          After checking the family background, it is now time for individual check. The salary and job security of the person concerned would be verified and his educational qualifications like Post Graduation or Masters only matter now. Apart from this, there are miscellaneous qualifications like owning a sedan, a flat, some 6 to 10 plots, lakhs and crores of bank balance and gold exchequer.

          All set and now the parents would make phone contacts to ensure that the boy and girl are still single. There have been occurrences when a pregnant lady would pick up and answer that she had married long back. I don’t know if there is no provision in these matrimonial sites to delete the accounts of those who have married or they leave it just like that knowingly. Perhaps, this is a marketing strategy.

          If these phone conversations also go positive, the parents would at last have the mind to show the photo to their wards. By that time, this person would have fallen in love with some other, who would not fit into any of these above – mentioned criteria. Exactly at the same juncture, he would be shown the picture of another individual, whom he/she had no idea about. The parents would emotionally affect him/her by stating, “This is the perfect match for you. We’ve spoken to their parents and they’re OK.”

          There are two endings to this story. If the ward relents to their condition, he would lose his dear but with a safe and secure life. If he/she denies, those lovers would somehow get married but not before facing so many evil forecasts and insults. This never matters to the ladies who had discussed earlier in public places, as they would have been continuing their social service for some other family. Never mind!! Marriages are Divine and are decided and made in Heaven!